Holidays can be a joyful time, but co-parents know they also come with unique stressors. Sorting out travel, parenting schedules, and traditions isn’t always simple and can strain even the best intentions. A solid child custody arrangement should include a holiday and summer parenting plan; if it doesn’t, putting one in place early can prevent conflict and make transitions smoother. With thoughtful planning, respect, and an understanding of Colorado family law, you can help ensure your children experience holidays that are happy, calm, and memorable. This post will walk you through building a holiday parenting plan that covers custody, travel, and traditions, all while keeping your children’s well-being front and center.
Start with Your Parenting Plan
Take time to review your current parenting plan well before the holiday season begins. Colorado parenting plans often include specific holiday provisions for major holidays, but details can sometimes be vague or flexible.
When reviewing, consider:
- Which parent has the children for each holiday (frequently divided up by even and odd years)
- Start times and end times for holiday parenting time
- Pick-up and drop-off locations, especially if weather conditions must be considered
If your plan doesn’t clearly address holidays, consider post-decree modifications to include holiday parenting time. Plan in advance to collaborate with your co-parent in writing. Don’t wait until the last minute to get your turtle doves in a row.
Plan Ahead for Travel
Colorado’s snowy weather can make travel unpredictable and sometimes impossible. It’s important to think about:
- Winter driving: Build in extra time for hand-offs and be flexible about delays
- Out-of-state trips: Most parenting plans require notice (often 30 days) before traveling out of state or abroad with children. Always provide itineraries, flight information, and emergency contacts.
If your trip falls outside your holiday parenting time, you’ll need a written agreement or a court order modification.
Honor Family Traditions, But Stay Flexible
Children thrive on tradition, but divorced or separated families sometimes struggle to divide them. Some solutions may include:
- Alternate years: One parent has Christmas Eve, the other Christmas Day, switching each year.
- Split the holiday: Morning with one parent, afternoon with the other. This works best when parents live close by.
- Create new traditions: Instead of competing for the “old way,” invent new customs: movie marathons, ice skating, or volunteering are all great starts.
The key is making sure children feel included, not caught in the middle.
Communicate Like It’s Business
When emotions run high, treat co-parent communication like a professional exchange:
- Stick to facts (dates, times, logistics).
- Use email, text, or your respective coparenting app to avoid misunderstandings.
- Confirm plans in writing.
This keeps interactions child-focused and reduces last-minute disputes.
What to Do if Your Co-Parent Won’t Cooperate
If your co-parent deviates from the plan, even for something reasonable, you have a few options.
- Attempt to negotiate in writing to create a paper trail of the request and their response
- Offer make-up time or trade a different holiday
- Request mediation to resolve the conflict amicably
- Seek the court’s involvement.
These solutions are more likely to be successful when you plan ahead and give yourself time to resolve any conflicts.
Managing Emotions and Guilt Around Holiday Parenting
It’s normal to feel sadness or guilt about not having your child on a particular holiday.
Remember:
- Your child benefits most from low-conflict, emotionally stable parents.
- “Holiday magic” isn’t confined to a date on the calendar – celebrations can be flexible.
- Share your plans for fun activities or family time, so your child knows the holidays will be special with both parents.
Helping Children Adjust to Holiday Changes After Divorce
Children need reassurance during big changes. New holiday plans can be hard to accept, especially if it’s the first holiday season celebrating with parents separately.
To support your children, be age-appropriate, honest, and reassuring:
- Let them know the plan in advance. This will give kids the opportunity to ask questions, come up with new traditions, or work with you to resolve negative feelings.
- Emphasize that they’ll celebrate with both parents, even if not on the exact day.
- Avoid blaming the other parent or expressing disappointment in front of them.
- Empower them to express feelings, but reinforce that the decisions are made by adults who love them.
- Consider inter-and intra-family dynamics as a blended family, including stepparents or siblings from different households, and how these relationships may affect holiday plans.
Keep Children at the Center of Holiday Parenting Plans
Above all, remember the holidays are about your kids. They shouldn’t feel guilty for enjoying time with one parent or worry about disappointing the other. When parents support each other’s holiday time, even from afar, children feel secure and loved.
A peaceful holiday season requires planning, flexibility, and empathy. By reviewing your parenting plan, coordinating travel, honoring traditions fairly, and keeping communication professional, and addressing holiday visitation issues proactively, you can build joyful holiday memories for your children year after year.
Need Support Crafting Your Holiday Parenting Plan?
If you’re feeling uncertain about how to navigate this holiday season post-divorce, you’re not alone. At Solutions Based Family Law, our Colorado divorce attorneys understand the challenges co-parents face and are here to help you create a plan that prioritizes your children’s well-being and fosters a positive co-parenting relationship.
Contact us today at (720) 420-3610 or reach out online to schedule a consultation. Let’s work together to make this holiday season as joyful and stress-free as possible for you and your children.